Sunday, August 26, 2012

Homeschooling Resources

I keep thinking I've reached a point of logical ignorance on finding new homeschooling resources.  I can't find time to use most of the resources I have.  But, I did just find another excellent one.  I'm glad to know other moms are doing Montessori at home, and without buying all the expensive factory-made material.  This is excellent.  And so is this!

Friday, August 24, 2012

Structure and Flexibility

We have started homeschooling, and for the most part, it is going well.  I love the flexibility of homeschooling.  I love the lower-stress environment which I can create for the kids and myself.  I love being with the kids during the day and getting to be totally involved in their schooling and curriculum/subject choices.
On the other hand, the thought of managing to cover every point of information that they ought to learn, and doing so in a meaningful way, such that they actually learn and are able to use and apply it is overwhelming.  The thought of lesson plans makes me nervous.  It is not that I don't have faith that I can do it.  It is just that I don't have much faith that I will do it.  Some subjects are not a problem that way.  Musical instruments are great, because I can help the kids practice at a moments' notice.  They have a work book for vocab and spelling that I really like.  Latin is fun.  History is all set.  PE is no problem.  Math is a breeze.  Art is a go.  Logic workbooks are at the ready. So what is stressing me out?  Language Art (which seems so ironic, because that is what I love best!) and Foreign language (is Latin right for the girls?  What about Spanish?) and assessments, writing assignments, etc.

Hmm, so apparently what is most stressing me out is the subjects in which I feel I have the most to offer. Interesting.  Is it because I can't bear to just get some curriculum and use it--I feel like I have to produce it myself?  Or is it because my expectations for the kids on that front are so high?  Whatever it is, this feeling of worry that the kids won't get everything they could or should get has been weighing on me.  Other home school moms would tell me not to worry, I know.  I have been trying to face it an deal with it.  So far, that has led to several things:
1. Looking at enrolling the kids in an online "virtual academy." http://www.k12.com/arva (and going so far as to start the application process)
2. Researching what makes teaching / learning effective.
3. Questioning why I am doing home school.
4. Recognizing that I need to step it up.  Yikes. This gets us to the topic of flexibility/structure.

How do you do that?  Be both flexible and structured, I mean?  In my former life (pre-kids) I was great at structure.  I thrived on structure.  I embraced it.  I think I still do/would.  Except that having kids taught me (read forced me) to be flexible.  That is a good thing, though.  I am grateful for the ability to be more flexible.  It is a good life skill.  However, somehow, somewhere along the way, flexible turned into something more like chaotic.  Or just, unstructured?

I am overstating things, actually.  Our family is not chaotic.  We definitely have some structure.  People are not constantly confused about what is going on.  We have breakfast, lunch and dinner.  We have morning and evening prayers, and family scripture study every day.  Dad goes to work, mom stays home.  We clean up the dishes after we use them.  We go to bed at consistent times (or the kids do, at least.) On Saturdays we clean the house and the kids take baths and we do something fun as a family.  On Sundays we go to church (we are even getting better at being on time) and engage in quiet family activities, including Family Home Evening part A.  Monday nights is Family Home Evening part B.  We do all those things quite consistently, except for when we don't.  The "don't" is the exception rather than the rule, but it exists nonetheless.

But even for all that, there is a lot of unstructured time.  Homeschooling is part of that time.  I have attempted to structure the homeschooling time.  I have a great excel spreadsheet print out that we refer to constantly from 8am to 2pm. It is currently under renovation, though.



So, now we come to the real issue: me.  The kids are always up by 7am, and ready for breakfast, family scripture study, and heading out for a walk.  I, however, am not.  This morning I got out of bed at 9am.  (Granted, that is very rare--it is usually more like 7am for me, too.)  And the reason for that anomaly is that I stayed up far, far too late for two nights in a row, worrying about home school stuff.  Ironic.  Anyway, this all has led to my understanding that in order for all this to work satisfactorily, I need to step it up.  That means I need to have more self-control (and head to bed by 9pm instead of 11:30) and be more accountable.  I need to live a higher law. I need to do things that make me nervous (like lesson plans.)

This is all very good for me.  Having to keep myself to a schedule and be disciplined without some outside influence bearing down on me requires a whole new level of growth.  I'm not good at it.  And you throw the necessity of flexibility in there, too, and WHEW, this is uncomfortable.  I believe I can do it, though.  I think I can, I think I can.  Getting to do home school inspires me to step it up, so I can make it work.  I want it to work.  I'm loving it, generally.  Whew.

So, it has been good to write.  Here is what I just learned:
1. I am most stressed by the subjects I love most.
2. I'm not doing too badly.  I haven't failed.  There is structure in place, and light ahead
3. I'll keep working on this, engage the children in the process, and enjoy the journey.

The kids are watching Planet Earth right now.  There are so many resources readily available for an excellent education.  I can do this!